So, a few months ago I got a message on Facebook asking if I needed help in a certain situation. I said yes, and agreed to meet him for coffee and discuss the issue. From that day on he was someone that I talked to. About everything. Friends. Hiking, swimming, fishing, hundreds of pictures of each other and together. Eventually as we learned each other we became inseparable. I told this person things I told no one else. I was completely myself. For the first time in years I had someone that I felt I was connected to heart and soul. We are both in relationships. Not pushing the boudries of friendship. Then we started pushing those boundries. "You make me happy." "I wish I was there" "I wish you were here". But the core was a true connection of common interests and ideas.
I thought.
Last week he said you are so beautiful. He's told me many times. I have told him the same thing. But the next day no text. No phone call. Nothing. I have realized there is absolutely nothing I can do about this. I can't make anyone want to be my friend, confidant, love. When that person is ready to walk away, he or she is ready. My only regret in our short infinity of perfect togetherness is I got no closure.
I sent messages. Crazy, neurotic messages. I was in a low, very extreme manic low. I wasn't mean, I sent pictures, quotes, songs. I was nuts. I couldn't believe my happiness had been stripped from me in a single 12 hours. One extreme to another. In the meantime, my boyfriend and I were going through issues. He's been very supportive. I've removed myself from the situation and letting my soul walk away. Ill be fine. But in learning to let go I have been so crazed. I hope one day he will come back and give me the closure I so desperately need. But in the meantime I'm going to build a stronger base with my boyfriend. We agreed to drop all walls that were stopping us from fully understandimg each other. I love him. I love my soul that walked away without looking back. How do you ever find that easy true connection again?
I sent messages. Crazy, neurotic messages. I was in a low, very extreme manic low. I wasn't mean, I sent pictures, quotes, songs. I was nuts. I couldn't believe my happiness had been stripped from me in a single 12 hours. One extreme to another. In the meantime, my boyfriend and I were going through issues. He's been very supportive. I've removed myself from the situation and letting my soul walk away. Ill be fine. But in learning to let go I have been so crazed. I hope one day he will come back and give me the closure I so desperately need. But in the meantime I'm going to build a stronger base with my boyfriend. We agreed to drop all walls that were stopping us from fully understandimg each other. I love him. I love my soul that walked away without looking back. How do you ever find that easy true connection again?
I read this the other day...I had no boundries with my soul.
I would still welcome him back in my life with no questions, if he chose to do so. I do not see that happening. So I'm going with this little tidbit of advice I read...
It is important to have boundaries and to not reveal more or do more than you are completely comfortable with. With that in mind, opening up and getting to know someone does take a certain amount of patience. Assess each new partner as an individual, and stay keenly connected with how you experience yourself while in his or her presence. You need someone with whom you can reveal your authentic self, not just a piece of you—and you are the only one who can bring that full you to the table.
Another piece I read...
CAN YOU FEEL THE LIGHT IN THIS VERY MOMENT?
Life.
It amazes me. Every day. With it’s highs and lows, ups and downs… It’s amazing.
Can you feel it? Or is your mind somewhere else?
As you read this, wherever you are; take a moment to stop. Close your eyes.
Breathe.
Feel the beating of your heart. The sounds of your surroundings. The earth beneath your feet.
Connect to this very moment.
Open your eyes. Know that wherever you are, whatever your life situation, there is one fundamental fact that will never escape you: you are here. Right now. Connecting to the present moment is the simplest way to recognize the beauty of being.
In our busy lives, it’s also the easiest to forget. So remember. And give a silent thank you to everything that is. You are alive! That alone is a miracle.
Find your glimpses of enlightenment, and cherish them.
Whatever you are holding on to… If it’s holding you back—let it go. If it’s no longer serving you—let it go.
If it doesn’t make you happy—let. it. go.
Life is meant to be lived light, with light, from light, through light. Don’t let your past weigh you down.
There is no limit to what you can manifest in your life when you let go of fear.
Don’t let fear guide you. See only love. Move where love wants you to move.
Let love lead the way.
